Tuesday, June 12, 2012

The Temptation to Cheat


Usually, when it comes to cheating in a relationship, people tend to focus on their partners and wonder if they might be unfaithful. l think it's perfectly normal, at some point of the relationship, to be worried about being cheated on. But have you ever been concerned that you might be the one who's unfaithful in your relationship? After all, temptation can be awfully tough to resist, especially when we have doubts about our current relationships.


So, what are the signs that you might be about to cheat?

1. A disconnect in the bedroom

Your behaviour in the bedroom will change. You might find that you now avoid intimacy with your partner and are not interested in cuddling. If you do have sex, you find that you make less eye-contact and there is less kissing during sex. Of course, some couples go through phases in the bedroom because of other issues, for instance, exhaustion from work. But if you cannot find any legitimate reason for being so disconnected in the bedroom, then it may be a warning sign that you're subconsciously distancing yourself from your partner.

2. Forming other relationships

Yes, we can have opposite sex friends while we are attached to one man. But if you find yourself trolling dating websites or even Facebook for new relationships ... or reconnecting with old ones, this is a major red flag. It suggests you're unsatisfied in your current relationship and you are looking to move on. You may start forming an emotionally intimate relationship with someone else other than your partner, such as a male co-worker. You share your thoughts and feelings with him and quite quickly, you will feel some sort of 'connection' and feel drawn to him.

3. Covering your tracks

Even though you aren't cheating on your partner (yet), you cover your tracks. There are already things that you are doing which you would rather your partner did not know. Are you deleting all the messages you send and receive from your male friend because you don't want your partner to realise how close you're becoming? Are you extra careful not to leave yourself logged in to Facebook, just in case your partner uses your computer? If you honestly feel that you're not up to something in the first place, you won't be like this. You won't feel like you need to cover your tracks. 

You tell yourself, it's only harmless flirting, he's just an old friend, or you may even rationalise with yourself that it's best to keep certain things from your partner so he won't jump to conclusions. You are well aware of the temptation to cheat, and think you have a handle on things. But do you really? Cheating always has to start some where... it doesn't just happen by accident.

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